


Lingering Sense

by RunaLiore



Series: D4DJ - AoTsuba [6]
Category: D4DJ First Mix (Anime), D4DJ Groovy Mix (Video Game)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Trans Female Character, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 03:47:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29343825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RunaLiore/pseuds/RunaLiore
Summary: Tsubaki wakes up at 3am from another nightmare. It's not the first she's had this week and her sleep debt is starting to pile up, so when Aoi offers to help her relax and get some rest, Tsubaki accepts. Still, she's hesitant to talk about the nightmares themselves... memories of her school days and the things people said to her once she started to transition. The things some people still say even in the present. To take her mind off of all that, Aoi holds her close and kisses her softly until she can fall back to sleep.
Relationships: Aoyagi Tsubaki/Miyake Aoi
Series: D4DJ - AoTsuba [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2103489
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17





	Lingering Sense

**Author's Note:**

> Hi hi~
> 
> Just a spontaneous light hurt/comfort fluff AoTsuba based on an idea I had today. Please enjoy!
> 
> As always, Tsubaki is a trans woman. Also yeah at the end there she gets herself overheated thinking about how she wants Aoi to be her wife :3

“Don’t!”

Air rushed over Tsubaki’s face and cold sweat made her shirt stick to her skin. Cotton rumpled in the dark and the bedsprings groaned as Tsubaki sat upright, one hand covering her face and the other clutching the sheets at her side.

It was just past 3am and she was awake, finally. Her nightmares weren’t usually so vivid or so persistent, but for the past four nights she remembered every detail and even felt the sound of words ringing in her ears. Words and names she didn’t want to hear hurled at her again, threats with the weight of certainty behind them, and the sensation of her body slowly twisting into something uninhabitable all swarmed around her.

“Mmn… Tsubaki?” A voice filled the dark, low and coarse and almost lost in the folds of the sheets. The bed settled again as Aoi sat up, bumping into Tsubaki and setting her hands on Tsubaki’s shoulders.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Tsubaki muttered, “Just a nightmare, I’m fine.”

“Really? You feel cold…” Aoi rubbed her shoulders gently and Tsubaki found herself leaning back into Aoi’s hands. She tried to thank her but her words came out as a weary hum, and for a moment they both sat there quietly. Aoi didn’t let her go, though.

“Tsubaki, when you said you were having trouble sleeping the past few nights… was that also because of nightmares?”

When Tsubaki had mentioned her trouble sleeping before she just gave the excuse that “for some reason,” she kept waking up in the middle of the night. Since Aoi already knew that much, she couldn’t see the point in lying any further.

“It just happens, sometimes. It’s not a big deal.”

“If it’s making you this tired and upset, I think it is.” Aoi paused, her hands still warming Tsubaki’s arms and her chest supporting her shoulders. “Are they about something that’s troubling you?”

“No, it’s not… I mean it is, but,” Tsubaki sighed, “it’s not anything I can do anything about.”

“Hmm…”

“Sorry, for waking you.”

Aoi shook her head and laughed quietly. “It’s not a problem, or rather the problem is that you’re feeling uneasy and having trouble getting to sleep. I might not be able to help with the nightmares but, would it be alright if I helped you get back to sleep?”

Aoi’s voice was so warm and soothing it filled the air around Tsubaki and coated her like fleece. Whatever guilt or anxiety she felt over keeping Aoi up was drowned out by the care and attention in that voice, so focused on Tsubaki and aimed so directly at her heart. She took a slow breath and leaned back, letting Aoi embrace her as she pulled the blankets back over them both. Soon Tsubaki had curled up almost into a ball and Aoi held her close, hands sliding inside the shirt Tsubaki wore as pajamas and gently rubbing her back. Aoi’s hands were warm, her fingers long and slender and precise as they ran down her back and alongside her spine. Back and forth, Aoi slowly ran her fingers over Tsubaki’s skin and gradually, Tsubaki felt her pulse settle and the tension in her chest relaxed.

Aoi nuzzled Tsubaki’s hair and planted a kiss across her forehead.

“Do you feel uncomfortable anywhere?”

Tsubaki shook her head. “No… this is good.”

“Good.” Aoi kissed her forehead again and held her close, firm but not tight and near enough that she could feel the gentle rise and fall of Aoi’s chest. Her palms pressed softly into Tsubaki’s shoulders, holding her with deliberate affection until she was able to relax. Soon, Tsubaki felt her mind wandering – not to memories of middle school or the words flung at her in her teens or the arguments she had with relatives early in her transition, but instead her thoughts meandered in an aimless and fluttering way. She thought of the feeling Aoi’s lips left on her face and cheeks. She thought of the delicacy of her fingertips, the light pressure of Aoi’s palms against the small of her back drawing her close. She thought of the smell of Aoi’s hair, her shampoo and a trace of her sweat and the faint hint of her cologne. This wasn’t a dream, but it felt just as surreal in a way… lying beneath her comforter with Aoi’s arms wrapped around her, so warm it was almost intoxicating and so, so soothing to the ache in her chest.

When Tsubaki was in seventh grade, Rika was the only person in her class who kept talking to her like normal even after she started wearing a skirt for the first time. Back then, Tsubaki was terrified of almost every step she took and even when nothing happened, she could feel the stares of her classmates piercing her like icicles. High school was better, only as long as people never found out that she was trans. Changing for Gym became an agonizing ritual – she was late so many days because she waited until most all of her classmates had gone before she even started to take off her blouse. None of that happened to her anymore, but the memories never left. She could barely remember her own eighth birthday, but those memories stuck around like words carved into granite? It might have been funny, if Tsubaki cared for irony and if it didn’t hurt like shit every time those memories crept into her dreams.

This time, though, the memories weren’t all there was to blame. Somehow a man at the last show Rondo played, someone whose face Tsubaki had already forgotten, had clocked her and made sure she knew it. He wasn’t trying to attack her though, and honestly maybe if he had she could have dealt with it more easily – he was aggressively supportive, so much so that Tsubaki first thought he was just an awkward fan, but soon his compliments turned into flirtations that felt almost like demands. Nagisa had jumped in and given her an excuse to walk away and nothing like that had happened since, but even so… even so, that sickly enthusiasm, those compliments that all felt like they wanted to extract some favor from her, all of that stuck in her mind and tangled up with her memories from school.

In the morning, Tsubaki decided… she would tell Aoi about this in the morning. For now, though, she felt so comfortable she could sleep for days with her head resting on Aoi’s chest… Which led to another problem: She was so comfortable she didn’t _want_ to fall asleep. Aoi was still laying drowsy kisses cross her forehead while stroking her skin, holding her close, and every once in a while humming the tune to one of their songs absently into the sheets. If they could stay like this even just for tonight, it would be a blessing. If they could stay like this for the rest of the week, Tsubaki would be overjoyed. If they could stay like this forever…

 _That- I…Alright, no more thinking._ Tsubaki shut her eyes tight and buried her face against Aoi’s breasts, cuddling close and trying her best to fall asleep before her daydreams became the things that kept her awake.


End file.
